


Evan Buckley Really Needs a hug

by kitkat0723



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Buck can't catch a break and he really needs one, Canon compliant in a few places, Comfort, Gen, Hugs, M/M, Not Beta Read, Sometimes we all need hugs, The Universe needs to stop using the 118 as a punching bag, Touch, buck really needs a hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-17
Updated: 2020-06-17
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:21:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24773800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kitkat0723/pseuds/kitkat0723
Summary: Originally posted on Tumblr, Now updated and posting here.Following the prompt by paranoidbean : Evan Buckley needs a hug after a bad call.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley & Bobby Nash, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Christopher Diaz, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Henrietta "Hen" Wilson, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Howie "Chimney" Han, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Maddie Buckley, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Comments: 16
Kudos: 157





	Evan Buckley Really Needs a hug

**Author's Note:**

> READ THIS BEFORE CONTINUING 
> 
> Content/Trigger warnings : Mentions of Car accidents, domestic violence (other people not the team), blood, natural disasters and loss of a child (Again not any of the team) Please do NOT read this if you are in anyway sensitive to these subjects as some of them could be triggering. 
> 
> Mature for Subject matter, Ao3 tag because of the Domestic scene.

Evan Buckley really needs a hug. One that he can sink into and get a small piece of himself, back together. The last twenty-four hours had been hell. First there was the pile up on the 405 where they’d lost more lives than they’d saved unfortunately. It always sucked, but when it was that much? It sucked Super hard. Then Maddie called and said his parents were flying in at the end of the week, so that meant he had to quickly plan a weekend getaway just to put as much distance between him and them as he could. After that phone call, while he was on his way to take a breath, the alarm rang so he was right back into “firefighter mode.” So yeah, Buck could really use a hug.    
He was just getting ready to sit down to eat, he’d missed lunch thanks to falling right on his face in the bunk room two hours ago after a call, when he felt a tap on his shoulder. It’s not the groan that escapes so much as the look on his face that has Hen pushing down whatever she’s about to say and wrapping her arms around him instead. “You did great today.” She whispers into his ear and he just nods and she lets him hold on for a second before he let go and sent her a smile and then sat down to eat.

It wouldn’t stop the replay in his head when he went home to sleep tonight, but it settled some of the frayed nerves.    
*** 

Maddie tells him he won’t be alone, pinky swears because yes, those are still sacred even in adulthood. Right now, he just wants to fall into someone’s embrace to prove that life won’t turn out that way for him. That he won’t end up alone, unwanted. When his sister finishes her coffee, she sets her mug on the table, stands and comes around it and wraps her arms around his neck, squeezing. His laugh is a little watery, but there as her hair tickles his neck like it always did. He’s happy she’s here, and that they have a relationship again. She’s thriving now that she’s with Chimney. He turns and dislodges his sister, then wraps his arms back around her. She lays her head on his, telling him he’s not alone, that she’s got him, like she used to do when their parents left them behind to go off to wherever. It’s comfort and warmth, and familiar. He doesn’t want to let her go, but then his phone rings reminding him he promised Eddie they’d go out tonight. So he untangles himself and tells her he loves her, and nothing in the world will ever tear his sister away from him again, and she tells him the same. This time, he believes it.   
***   
Calls involving kids always hit the hardest. This one, hurt worse than usual. The kids mom had been run off the road, right into a creek, and thanks to the unusual amount of rain to hit the area this year, the car sank right to the bottom. By the time 9-1-1 was called, the mother and son were barely hanging on. Buck waited while Bobby sent Eddie and Chim, instead of him, heart in his throat. Counting the minutes it takes them to resurface. The boy was only six. He sinks to knees to try to help Hen, but his fingers don’t work like they need to, and he feels everything he felt a year ago come crashing down around him. He can’t breathe, and words won’t leave his mouth. They’re stuck, just like his screams for Christopher when he wakes up in the middle of the night gasping for air, feeling like the water’s choking him again.   
On the ride back to the station, no one says a word. When they pull in, Buck is the first one out of the truck and out of his turn out gear. He heads right to the bathroom to throw up the corned beef hash Bobby made for breakfast. When the shaking stops, and he feels he’s got himself under a little bit of control he leaves the bathroom.   
The first word inside the firehouse since their return is, “Bucky!” Heart slamming into his throat, afraid he’s stuck in another nightmare, he whips around to see Christopher walking across the floor all smiles, his father and Carla closely behind him. Buck falls to his knees as tears fall unashamed from his eyes. He gathers the boy close and holds him tight, the little pat on his back reassuring him Chris is _alive,_ and whole and safe. He raises red rimmed eyes to Eddie and mouths a quick thank you. Eddie smiles and mouths an ‘I love you, thank you.’ back. Chris pulls back a little and pats his face, all smiles. Buck breathes for the first time in three hours.   
***   
He’s pacing the waiting room floor, at this point the one eighteen should just have their own, the weight of the rain still clinging to his uniform. He wants to scream, rage, but his throat is too raw, too bruised. Tonight he watched the love of his life get buried alive. It wasn’t right and shouldn’t have happened, but if anyone is a natural and man-made disaster magnet, it’s the whole firehouse he walked into three years ago.   
“Buck?” Bobby stands a few paces away, caution in his eyes. “Why don’t you get changed. You’ll be warmer.” In his hand is Buck’s duffle bag. Buck shakes his head, resumes his pacing. He doesn’t want to move from this spot until they know. Dry drowning, pneumonia, hell, who knows what can happen. No way.   
They can’t see Eddie until they bring his core temperature up, check him out. Buck just wants to know for sure Eddie is alive. They’ll deal with the fall out from more nightmares inviting themselves into their bedroom later, that plaster themselves against the walls and sit there waiting to strike. He shakes himself out of those thoughts. He wants to hold Eddie, make sure he’s okay, alive, breathing. Wants to touch, reassure himself his boyfriend is still here. Buck’s hands go to his hair, dragging through them, thoughts spiraling. “Buck.” This time, a strong hand rests on his shoulder, the same one that pulled him back away from the cave in, and the sob that was stuck for hours breaks free. His knees buckle as arms hold him up again because doing it himself is just not possible.   
Bobby gathers him close. Always strong, even when he wasn’t. They’re past the bullshit and have a great relationship now. He just needs someone to keep him upright until he can hold Eddie again.   
***  
The bathroom was covered in blood. It wasn’t fair, and wasn’t right. Not for someone so promising. There was once again, nothing they could do. He really wished they didn’t have these calls. But of course they did. And of course they’re the ones that find the note, detailing everything. Looking around, his eyes don’t find Eddie’s but Chimney’s looking back at him. Knows they’re thinking the same thing. How two years ago, they could have known the person laying there. He turns and leaves, heading right for the trucks. It’s been almost two years now. Why can’t the past just stop haunting them? He opens the door on the truck and gets in, waiting. Bobby will probably add another mark on his file for leaving, but today, he doesn’t care. Not after _that._  
He’s in his head again, when the door opening startles him. He’s expecting Bobby or Eddie, instead he finds Chim. Neither says a word as the other man leans over and pulls Buck into a hug, and Buck is hugging him right back. They needed the touch, the reassurance. “She’s okay.” They say it together, a laugh settling between them as they speak the same thought. His sister was safe and happy and at home. Not broken and gone on a bathroom floor because someone she loved didn’t love her. Chim pulls out his phone, shoots off a text to his wife. A few minutes later, she calls and they talk until they spot the rest of the team coming out the house they were called to. He breathes a little easier when Maddie tells him to come to dinner and bring Eddie and Christopher because her and the kids miss them. Work had gotten busy, for all of them. What they needed was a family day. Especially after this.   
***   
His, their, entire world, went up in smoke. Natural disasters always find them almost like the universe loves to use them as it’s personal punching bag. But not usually this close to home, at home. Their entire life together, just gone. Nothing but rubble and ash. He can’t look away, but knows their neighbors, fellow citizens need help, and they have a job to do.   
“It’s just things babe. We’ll figure it out together.” Eddie places a kiss against his temple, something they never do at work as he looks towards where their home, their life used to be. Everything gone.   
“It’s memories, it’s us, it’s…” He doesn’t have the words and yet he can’t look away.   
“Christopher is okay, Claire is okay, remember they’re with Maddie and my sisters and everyone back in Hershey.” A family vacation neither could attend.   
“I know, Eds, it’s…” Where they could be themselves. Where their demons didn’t hide. Where they could be themselves, when they were broken, when they were together, where they were free. It’s not fair to have it taken away.   
Eddie steps in front of him and pulls him into a tight embrace. “We’ll get through, just like we always do. And who knows, maybe the Chief can put us in for some much needed vacation time.” Eddie pulls back a little and winks at him, Buck laughs for the first time in days.   
“I’ll.. I’ll be sure to ask him that.” Eddie smiles fondly at him.   
“Come on, we have to finish up if the better Captain Diaz wants to go on vacation to see his kids.” He most definitely wants to see his son and daughter.   
“Right.” Before they leave though, Buck pulls him back into an embrace and holds Eddie close.   
He needs to touch, the embrace for a little while longer until they have to be separated by fire and ash that falls like snow around them and clings to the skin.   
  
Evan Diaz could really use a hug, and thankfully his husband gives him one before they return to the universe trying to turn the state they love to rubble. 

**Author's Note:**

> Hopefully you enjoyed this. 
> 
> Kudos/comments make my day. I was trying to figure out what to write for day three of Eddie Diaz Week and then the prompt came across my dash, then wouldn't leave me alone so I wrote this in about 45 minutes. I edited it and expanded in a few spots, then decided to post it here. 
> 
> Find me on Tumblr : https://kitkat0723.tumblr.com/


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